It can be quite heart-breaking for parents to see their children struggle – however – for the parents of autistic children, the struggle can be a real thing.
Meltdowns and aggressive behavior of autistic children often take place in public, such as the park, the classroom, or a playground – and more often than not – during a simple conversation where their autistic child might find it challenging to follow a conversation as they might take more time than usual to process information.
Nonetheless, as a parent of an autistic child, you will want to know that there are different ways you can help your child with learning autism social skills and making things easier for them in life. Usually, autistic children start their learning sessions by undergoing therapy, but their learning journey doesn’t stop there.
As a parent, you will want to start helping and teaching your autistic child at home – and – the best way to do this is by understanding your child and providing them a safe space to be themselves.
You will want to understand the simple fact that children don’t start to learn social skills while living in a bubble. While therapy is absolutely crucial for them, what is even more important is what happens once the therapy session is over.
Here is what you will want to do to help your child learn basic social skills and navigate through life successfully.
Read on to learn more!
Table of Contents
Forget Your Fears
Of course, it is natural for the parents of autistic children to have fears, including fears about their child’s future. That said, if you truly want to help your autistic child, you will want to put your own social assumptions in the back of your mind and understand the simple fact that your autistic child’s future is as important as any other child’s future.
Your autistic child is unique and gifted in their own way, which means that they can be a crucial part of society. So, you will want to provide your autistic child a safe space first where you don’t worry but celebrate their uniqueness.
For the people who aren’t on the spectrum – certain behavior comes naturally to them, such as making eye contact while communicating and greeting people when they walk into a classroom or any other room.
Similarly, certain behavior will be second nature to your autistic child, such as not making eye contact and averting their eyes from strangers’ faces. Here is the thing – people with high-functioning behave differently.
Mostly, they are anti-social, which means that they won’t be comfortable in situations where normal people would feel comfy. You will want to understand that the behavior of your autistic child is not automatic, and as a parent, you will want to be acknowledging this fact.
The only way to control your autistic child’s meltdowns and aggressive behavior is by being patient, especially when your child is learning social skills by taking mini steps.
Understand Your Child’s Triggers
As parents of autistic children, you will want to understand your child’s triggers. You will also want to educate yourself on your child’s condition to determine the best therapy for them.
As a parent, it can sometimes be challenging to accept that your child is autistic and that they will outgrow their autism. You will want to accept that there is no cure – but – early detection is the start of their journey.
You will want to carefully read the components of the various social-skill courses for autistic children. We recommend opting for a program that includes a component for the parents as well. If such a program exists, you will want to take advantage of it.
The more you educate yourself on autism and the better you will be able to understand how you as parents can help your autistic children, the better capable you will be to reinforce the social skills that will benefit your autistic child later in life.
Acknowledge there is No Wrong & Right Behavior
As a parent, you will want to understand the simple notion that there is no such thing as right or wrong behavior, which means that you will want to speak kind words to your child. Always remember this simple parenting hack – the language you use with your child becomes their inner voice, which is why you will want to be mindful about the selection of your words.
You will want to refrain from using the word “wrong” when referring to your autistic child’s behavior as it can potentially upset your autistic child, who naturally wants to be right and not wrong. We recommend using the words “expected” and “unexpected” instead of “right” and “wrong.”
Suppose your autistic child isn’t making eye contact when someone is talking to them; instead of telling your child that it is “wrong” to not make eye contact, you will want to tell them that it is “expected” of them to give attention to the person who is talking to them.
By telling them what is expected of them during a real-life moment, you can provide your autistic child with concrete examples that they can practically practice and observe.
We know that autistic children find it challenging to process information in their minds, which is why you will want to explain the expected social behavior by giving concrete examples in any given situation.
Give Your Child the Platform to Practice
Along with behavior therapy and providing your child with real-life examples of what is expected and unexpected of them in any given social situation, you will also want to help your child practice the social skills in real life.
We know that the only right way to learn social skills is by practicing the skills in real-life social situations. Once their session is over, you will want to make sure that they practice their lesson afterward.
A great way to make them remember social etiquette is by establishing a reward system at home, too, apart from providing them with a reward system at the therapy sessions. You will want to encourage your autistic child to practice their social skills by interacting with others.
Allow them to recognize and implement the expected and unexpected behavior themselves.
